I'll bleed this skyline dry
Hear Me Out

I like to give excuses for everything and anything. If Im not in the mood to do anything, I idle around.

I let my friends say as they please, but that don't mean I agree with what they say. I just accept that its their opinion.

I can be an ass hole. I can be the nicest person on earth. Just depends on who you are(:

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." -Matthew 5:8

Complains?
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Monster devours a innocent blur piece of ham

WEEKEND!
Fucking nerd here just got home from some fancy Japo restaurant, I miss the good shoyu ramen I slurpped down in japan. Gawddam them japanese fucks for making me good food.

Whats absolutely crazy to me is that, I thought I gave this person up completely when we ended. But now, I cant help but stop giving attention to the other and care for the person again. My heart says help, my head says shes a big girl.

If you were still mine, I'd give you hug and tell you, you've been a silly little girl who thinks too much. I wouldnt slap you for smoking, I'll slap myself, one of the reasons for smoking would prolly have something or everything to do with what I did to you. If I wasnt sincere to you, then I've never been sincere to the world, which is impossible. Actions speak louder than words.

The "disgust" part on msn was not for you love, it was for a japanese fucker.

Nerd here, started reading Dr. Seuss' Green eggs and ham! So freakin' funny! The book took barely 20mins for me to finish, but I read it over and over again. Cant help but smile to myself when I read it. It made me happy so I bought the hard cover version and soft cover version.

I wrote like 2 paragraphs on missing(literally) sam(on not purpose), and how, poks, bryan, miley and anthea bastarding me for missing out. But I shant. Tuesday killed me please. But it is ancient history now...gawd its tuesday! Nows saturday!

I got something dam funny from CCN day that I kept at the back of my head.

Anthea and I walked around, and I was like...vet tech doing some animal grooming right? So i was like..."eh do you think they can tell the difference between my fat rabbit and a uber fat poodle?"...anthea's face was stricken with disblief. So i continued imitating what i'd do...

Jane: eh yo, here you go *hands fat rabbit over*
vet stud: uhhh sorry but we dont do rabbits.
Jane: this aint no rabbit! its my dog. hybrid you can say?
vet stud: *rumages through notes on animals* I've never come acrossed this breed before.
Jane: well now you have.

Yes, Im asking for it. Having them vet tech students kill me with rabies infected lab rats. But its alright, my vet techy friends wont let me die right? *hears cage rattling* uhhh ehhh those doors better be locked!




Friday, November 21, 2008
History

Listen to the song lyrics- its got more meaning than any poem I can pop into my head.

History by Funeral for friend

Dear friends of this academy
oooh romeo is bleeding to death
To see a friend bleed to death, what for
Some kind of metaphor that I cant see?
So I'll drink until I see it.

This sky will make me sick
So I'll give up on you
I'll give up on this
This sky will make me sick
So I'll give up on this
I'll give up on you

Archers in your arches
Raise your fingers for one last salute
And bleed this skyline dry
Your history is mine

So you want to hold me up and bring me down
Yes, you want to hold me up and break me down
I don't care for your sweet scent
Or the way you want me more than I want you
and I don't care for your sweet scent
Or the way you want me more than I want you

Archers in your arches
Raise your fingers for one last salute
And bleed this skyline dry
Your history is mine

Archers in your arches
Raise your fingers for one last salute
And bleed this skyline dry
Your history is mine..

It's all mine..
It's all mine..
It's all mine..

Archers in your arches
Raise your fingers for one last salute
And bleed this skyline dry
Your history is mine..

Archers in your arches
Raise your fingers for one last salute
And bleed this skyline dry
Your history is mine...




Forget me, look forward.

Relieved, I am. For A reason ANTHEA/POKS/LUCKY knows HAHAHAHAH!

Dont worry, Im still happy, hahaha! Happiness carries over I guess.

I heard this saying and I realised so many things.

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift. Thats why its called present.

*grins* Tomorrow is never a mystery if only you knew what you were looking for(:

Today was BMIC quiz. Gawd. I needa start studying and not take this sem likka funfair *AHEM MILEY AHEM*. I put "Cheese" as the food product and "Cheesobacillus" as the bacteria. HAHAHAH! It made me laugh at myself. Jeez. Anthea and poks were vibrating on either side of me. The quiz was passable, but not scorable for me at least.


Your smile is gonna get me through saturday and sunday, and monday I shall look forward to. I wish the 3 hour BMIC labs will never end as much as Anthea wants AHEM. But I like things the way they are for now, just looking at a blur face with nice eyes.

What do you see when you see two friends sitting down and talking?
Shit. I see the person I wanna see sitting there alright. Shows me that I can actually talk to this person likka bestie, not that I lack people to talk you bout stuff.


.... I shall end it here.

Wanted to write more, but I dont feel like writing now(: Cheers mates!

Listen to the song.




Thursday, November 20, 2008
dont hold back on me now. Go on.

Gawd does this day just gets better and better.

Jap proj, cellb proj, csas proj, study for BMIC quiz, practice jap(which Ive not done in 35million years), get a certain person's brithday present wrapped, and finish my 2 novels I oh so ambitiously started.

But onna whole, I love today.

I try so hard to walk away, I try so hard to look away, I try so hard not to smile, I try so hard to supress the feeling. In the end, I still end up stopping, staring, smiling and feeling.

Its time for me to go now, before I leave I have one last thing to do. *hold down middle and ring finger using thumb whilst giving a devilish grin* Its all good. Its all gooooood.

Look at me in the eyes and tell me what you want, I gave you my all. I dont want anything from you, I just want you to be happy, then and now.




Wednesday, November 19, 2008
MY DAY ROCKS MY KNICKERS!

To poks,

I know I know, I dont know the person that well, I am not "suppose" to feel this way, I know "its-not-the-right-thing-to-do-and-its-totally-awkward". Say it once, I get it.

I know you care, I know you dont understand how I can be this happy even though I broke up with someone barely 2 weeks ago. But this is me, if you dont listen to the things I say then I wont bother saying anything anymore, when I say "I am not the kind of person that holds on. I see no point in crying over spilt milk, the milk's as good as gone. Instead of wailing over the milk thats on the floor, go pour yourself another cup." I am pouring myself another cup, well considering I left the spilt milk there and its prolly cheese already.

I know your not the type that gives up on something so easily, thats you, this is me! I am not you, I do not hold on. Please. There is a THICK line of difference between my personality and yours. HAHAHAHAHAH!

The end.

LOVE TODAY LOVE TODAY ABSOLUTELY LOVE TODAY, cept the no lab part which totally crapped on my parade.

AH DOH! I love today, how I wished my convo with sherie never had to end, and I'd stand there trying to punch my number into her phone. HAHAHHAHAHAH! God was right, out of every bad thing that happens, a good thing is waiting around the corner for you. *grins* I knowwww now what I've missed out for this longgggg!!!

Something happened today, that I dont quite understand or cant quite grasp. Why did you have to go and................my fingers?.... Im confused. No, fify's being clamped down by old man jones on this one. I, Jane, dont want it to happen, I thought I closed thAt door a long time ago. Both my fingers still have your grazed-feeling-thingy on em. I looked into your eyes, they.... told me something I dont want to know now. Please, no. SAM SAM SAM SAM SAM SAMMMMM! *cross fingers over my head*

OHHHH went to bedok, while mummy got dinner, I went to the video shop, and my hands just took whatever movie, Kungfu panda, narnia, WALL.E, kungfu dunk or some shit lik that, and dont mess with the zohan....GAWD. The bill was so long, TG, they accepted nets.

*cross my fingers* SAM *continues to cross*

I've never felt sucha strong pull towards a person before. This aint head over heels, this is straight up trippin'. I do admit, Ive wanted certain people and I get them. But this one, I wont do anything, just look. The more I think, the more I look, the more I want. Im not afraid to ask for number, name, a cup of "coffee", but Im just too tired(*cough* idle *cough*) shaddup. And Im giving myself space and time, so chill people, I know what Im doing.

The end.
My day was made in the morning, made in the afternoon and made in the evening. Shit. Thanks God(: Dont tease me or I might think your falling for me too! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

The new music, is the shit. Love the guitar tune.




Tuesday, November 18, 2008
ANGER BEYOND THE LEVELS OF HELL.

IM BACK.

Sudden rush of ANGER.

NO BMIC LAB TOMORROW? FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!

Natasha shut the fuck up bout sunshine! they shat on my fucking parade!

WHAT THE FUCK IS TODAY?

Make Jane pissed off day. No SAM today, no LAB tmr, on top of that, I MISS MY HAM):

Im going to sleep now. I am in no mood for anything. If anyone should piss me off tomorrow, God save the Queen. SAM SAM SAM NO SAM? DAMMMMM!

God STOP TEASING ME PLEASE!!!




Sickening behavior that needs to stop.

FUCKKKKKKKKK! SAM SAM SAM!!! WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO GO TO THE FUCKING MUSEUM! Fucking gonnna burn that piece of shit down man!!! *silent scream and yaders profanities*

God please stop teasing me.

Omg. Now that I missed the perfect oppotunity to sing along with OneRepublic's 'stop and stare.' The museum's shine is COMPLETELY overshadowed by it. Dont talk to me about today. I feel like burning the memory of today.

*continues to bawl my eyes out over the table, chair and all over*

WEDNESDAY IS TOMORROW. I swear if anything gets in my way, Imma rip their balls over whether scrotums or ovaries. 2 days never stop and stare = 2 days of hell.

Oh wells, I've missed your sight for so longggggg....I feel shitty now having not notice earlier. NEVERMIND ALL I LOOK FORWARD TO TMR FOR THAT INNOCENT LOOK. Its the only thing ringing in my head, only thing I want to see now more than ever.

This is the first time I really regret a decision I made in the past. Regret wholeheartedly. But the biggest part is, I regret something I did not do, and now I want to do it soooo badly. *stop harping on the past Jane, you'll get your chance and make it good*

BMIC LAB BMIC LAB BMIC LAB!!

one last thing before I ciao.

GAWD. STOP TOUCHING!! He's ATTACHED. She's got SOMEONE ELSE. I am SURE AS HELL not for you. SAM THE HAM ALL THE WAY OVER YOU ANYDAY. Do you realise how despo you look? Do you realise that we dont like it? Do you realise that it annoys us A FUCK LOAD? Must you keep touching people like that? Can you please stop, can you please read our body language, can you please respect yourself and your dignity and stop fucking stripping and touching people like that!! Do you think we are really laughing when you "strip" people? I am not telling this to your face because you are a friend. If you want, I will tell it to your face, just say the word, and I'll tell you off whether sam is there or not! We aint your girlfriend or boyfriend!! You cant touch someone like that! Why do you think people keep away from you, stay a distance from you? Look at the things you do. They really scare people. I get shivers down my spine.




Monday, November 17, 2008
SAM THE HAM

Remind Jane never to play with elephant glue again.

Gawd why! Everytime I play with elephant glue, some part of me always get glued together!! Last time I was superglueing my basketball shoe base together, and my pinky and ring finger got glued together. Now my index finger got glued with my middle finger.

*Silent screams*
*bangs head on the table profusely*
*silent screams again*

Why does this always happen to me? Nevermind Jane, wednesday's coming. *snap* Everything's good nowwww.

*silent scream*

You were in fronna me all this time, yet I just walked passed you looking for someone else. How could I be this blind? I should've smiled back, I should've been nicer, I should've paid attention.

*silent scream*

Mmmmm Wednesday's coming yeah? Uh huh.

One look is priceless, one smile is unforgettable. My legs go jelly prancing, my heart goes jolly leaping. Jane turns into a happy clamp. Yet how can a total strange do something like this? You live in a place where few have reached and those who left have been torn down. So delicate, Im afraid to touch for Im afraid of wanting, yet I wanna hold for a minute, an hour, a day, a month, a year or forever.

SAM! WHERE IS THAT STUPID PIECE OF HAM?

*claps hands likka fucking bimbo*

*silent screams*

Go listen to "Part of the list" and "Lie to me" and "Mad" by Ne-Yo.




Sunday, November 16, 2008
RUN SAMMY RUN!!

SUNDAY THEN MONDAY THEN tuesday THEN WEDNESDAY!!!

YAY!!

Omg Omg. Really cannot WAIT. Im getting restless just thinking about mondays and wednesdays. One would think that Id seen my fill on tuesday,wednesday,thursday and friday. One'd be wrong alright. BMIC LAB BMIC LAB!!

Wah poks. I think you should have a look at this dude in my church. I was behind him today during mass...GAWD was he MMMHMMM. But the first thing that shot through my head was "omg. if he's gay, God would be too dammm fair man!!" Everything about him got checked off in my "gay guy" list. *cross fingers* No no nooooo...I swear i wasnt looking or thinking of wanting him. Fify wants sam, but I already put my foot down that rum is not even up for consideration.

ANTHEA you should be 987654321% SURE and not 98.7654321% WE GOT YO BACK ON THIS ONE!! You scarificed CCN for me. Now its my turn to repay you kindness a 100folds *GRINS AND WINKS* GO ON GIRL! Take the leap, if you fall, we'll catch you. Besides what are friends for if not to wipe your ass fo you hm? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Im loving it alright, poks and narnia, anthea and AHEM. Dont worry. Im satisfied just looking, its the fun part. People watching. Jane's fetishes change, from liking outgoing and dramatic people to, quiet and subtle people. Its too much drama for me to handle. A little peace and quiet. Its all up to fify now that Ive convinced old man jones. Anytime your ready spoilt baby.

CIAO! Its sunday and tomorrow's monday. We are going to have fun.

"When you like someone, you begin to see them around more often. You begin to realise their presence." Jane says to Anthea on the topic of AHEM.